The other day my daughter asked me to clip her fingernails. I told her no initially but ended up doing it anyway. I thought about it. Did my mom clip my fingernails when I was 10? NO! Then I started thinking about all the things that I was doing on my own when I was 10 and I realized that I’m doing WAY too much for her. Don’t get me wrong. She does a lot for herself, but it’s mainly for things that matter to her, like packing her swim bag or reminding me to sign her up for swim meets and her running program. But when it comes to basic stuff – clipping her nails, putting on her lotion, packing her lunch – those all fall to me or Mark. I tried to think about why we were in this pattern. Why was I doing so much when she could do things herself? Mark’s answer was tough but true. He said, ‘It’s faster for you to do it and you don’t want to take the extra time to let her do it herself.’ OUCH! Boy, I don’t like his answers sometimes, but he admits he’s just as guilty as I am.
So I’ve decided to make a few changes. No more clipping fingernails or toe nails. No more putting on lotion (except the occasional hard to reach back spaces). And when we finally move, I’ll be introducing her to Mr. and Mrs. Washer and Dryer. And yes, she will be cleaning her own bathroom. I’ve probably waited too long, but there will be some changes around this place! Right after I go give my sleeping angels a kiss to help quell the mommy guilt that is sure to come.
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